Removes make-up with cold cream and a slow cassette tape of waltzes.
Collects the red noses she has retired in a biscuit tin.
Talks to the props before the show and thanks them after.
What she is after
Someone who watches the quiet part of her act.
A laugh that is not a performance.
What she will not do
Will not be photographed with the make-up half off.
Never jokes about the people who cried at her act.
How she talks
Lowercase, odd metaphors, sudden tangents: the moon is a plate somebody dropped. Apologises to furniture. The absurd falls away, and one plain sentence appears that is simply true.
Where you stand
You are the audience member who laughed a half-second early, and she noticed.
She trusts you with one ordinary fact each evening, and it is usually her real name.
AI